In my company, there is a research track and there is a consulting track. It is really hard to make out who is on which track. Researchers work on consulting projects and consultants keep adding primary interviews based on client's budgets!!! 

However, at least one researcher proved that he is a researcher and also why is he a researcher. The guy sent me a feedback saying that one of my slides is not looking 'nice' as it does not follow the 'standard template'. Not that I had prepared a deck in a flashy and jazzy template of my choice. I did use the standard template of the company. What he did not find nice was that I did not use the standard ugly looking tables but represented the information in a visually-appealing manner. 

Buddy, I know you do not understand it but you do not have to make it so obvious!!! 

Healthcare(ful) in India

'Satyamev Jayate', Aamir Khan's television show, has been touching upon several issues in the society. Female foeticide, dowry system, child sex abuse....issues that we all know about and have been among us since ages. The show has been getting a lot of attention and I hope it is able to make some changes, at least in the way we think.

Today's episode was on the medical/healthcare system in India. Among the four topics that the show has discussed so far, this is the topic that I could relate to the most. I have worked in the healthcare space in India and am also a fairly unhealthy person!

In my previous job, I was working in healthcare consulting and as part of my work, I interacted with a lot of representatives of pharma companies,  health insurers, third-party administrators, government officials, patients, hospital administrators and most importantly, doctors. I learnt a lot about the healthcare system in India and it was fairly depressing. I thought I will share some incidents, interactions, personal experiences....

1. As per a representative of a leading pure-play health insurer, "our job is to sell as many policies as possible and settle as little claims as possible. We do our best to create issues for the claiming customer and show that the case is either not part of the cover or it is a pre-existing condition"
2. The CEO of a leading global medical devices company once asked us to take up a project that would involve giving 'training' to some of the leading doctors in India!!! He wanted the training to be conducted abroad....China, Mauritius etc. The plan was to have a 7-day training that would have involved 1-2 hour optional sessions on each day. The trainer would have been some leading doctor from US or Europe to ensure that we do not hurt the egos of the participants by calling an Indian doctor as the trainer. Remaining hours would have been spent on sightseeing and parties. Each doctor attending the training would have got a laptop as a gift. All (I mean ALL) kinds of requests and needs of the attending doctors would have been taken care of. Participation would have been taken care by the client and their medical representatives. The client did not want their name to be published in any training material, banners/posters but they wanted us to ensure that the participants know who is funding this 'training'. For this, they wanted us to quote an all-inclusive figure; there was no need to submit any bills. He indicated that we can charge our commission on this..."whatever it is...30-50%". I must say it was pretty tempting and I did consider leaving my job and starting my own company for handling such trainings!!! 
3. Some of the leading doctors have daily slots for meeting patients, meeting medical representatives and meeting research and consulting firms
4. Everyone knows that the job of a Medical Representative is not to talk to doctors and tell him/her the benefits of the products but to ensure that the doctor prescribes the product. No matter if it is effective or not. However, once we were approached by a leading global pharma company to do a study in order to find out if the doctors are 'actually' prescribing the products or not!! We did not take up the study but I know of a case where a young medical representative of a leading pharma MNC in India barged into the room of a doctor and scolded him when she found that the doctor was not prescribing the products of her company even after promising her!!!
5. Satyamev Jayate talked about a scheme in Karnataka called Yashaswini. There are several such schemes in India, which have been initiated by Central government and various state governments. The idea is to help the people, who cannot afford medical treatment, in getting decent to good medical services. Such schemes are called Mass Health Insurance schemes or Macro Insurance Schemes. Some of the other examples are Rajiv Aarogyasri (Andhra Pradesh), Rashtriya Swasthya Bima Yojana (BPL families), Rashtriya Arogya Nidhi (BPL families), Janani Suraksha Yojana (rural BPL women in Andhra Pradesh), Ayushmati Yojana (Chhatisgarh), Sarv Swasthya Mission (Jharkhand). There are several such schemes and these are definitely a step in the right direction. However, an ICICI bank employee who was dealing with tie-ups with such schemes in eastern and north-eastern states once told me that there is a lot of corruption happening in such schemes. Rightful members are often denied treatment citing unavailability of doctors, equipments, facilities and medicines. And membership cards are often 'sold' to people who are not eligible for such schemes. So, though the direction is right, the steps are not always correct
6. The  entire healthcare system in India has become too commercialized. Doctors often behave like agents selling bus tickets. Around 5 years back, my father needed a spine surgery. It was a complicated procedure with high risk involved. Hence, we were looking for the best possible hospital in India. Not essentially in terms of facilities but in competence. Some suggested NIMHANS in Bangalore, someone suggested Escorts in New Delhi. I went to Escorts (New Delhi) to show my father's reports to the doctors and get their opinion. I explained the situation to the receptionist and she called a doctor. The person who arrived did not look like someone with a lot of experience. He took me to his chamber and complimented me on my intelligence as 'I came to him'. He told me about several cases in which he saved the life of the patient. He also told me that though it is a tricky case, it is pretty straightforward for him. He indicated that the surgery would cost a few lakhs (NIMHANS, though it has a different model, had indicated 30-40 thousand for the surgery). He noticed my confusion and then he took out his mobile and showed me videos of various surgeries (it was not clear who was performing them but it did look like a hospital in US). I did not like all this "marketing" and told him that we will think about it. His tone suddenly changed and he started telling me that I am going to put the life of my father in danger. He started to emotionally blackmail me. I was feeling disgusted and thankfully walked away. Finally we got the surgery done in the Research & Referral Hospital (Armed Forces) in New Delhi. It was successful and it was free of cost
7. Once we took my mother to Image Hospital (Madhapur) in Hyderabad. She was not feeling well and had become very weak. The doctor told us that they would have to put her on drips (intravenous fluids). It was pretty straightforward; you take fluids and you feel better. No need for any extensive care. They took her to a general ward, which was extremely dirty. We asked for a private room. It was no better but at least it gave her some privacy. Soon a doctor came and asked how was she feeling. Out of courtesy, she said, "I am feeling better". He went away. After a while another doctor came and followed the same process. Then a junior doctor came.  Later, another guy came. This went on for few hours. We started getting scared due to all this attention as we wondered if the doctors are not telling us everything. In the morning (around 5-6 am), my mother told us that she is feeling better and wants to go home. The staff was reluctant. They told us that discharge formalities can be processed only after 11 am. They also said that after 9 am, we will be charged for another day for the private room. This became ugly as I started shouting at everyone in sight. Later, they quickly processed the papers and gave us a bill of INR 8,400!!! In that, the room charges were only 1,600. IVF was INR 150. Remaining were the charges of all the doctors and their uncles and aunts who came to say 'Hi'!!! I did tell the main doctor and the hospital administrator that they should get out of this profession and start looting people on the highway. They gave me a smile
8. I once got a routine check-up done in a hospital in Hyderabad and the results indicated that there was almost nothing right with me. Instead of getting panicky and getting started on treatment, I thought I will get another test done but at a different hospital. The new hospital asked when was the last time I had got the tests done. I told them 6 months back and the tests were absolutely normal. I also told them that I do not have any health issues and I am just getting the tests done to check if there is any issue. Few hours later I got test results and it indicated I was fit enough to climb Mt Everest or go on a space mission!!! It did not help. I was not sure which test result to trust!!!

(Picture Courtesy: Grinning Planet)

A Dictator in Making?

A few days, I saw a video of a public interaction of the current West Bengal Chief Minister, Mamata Banerjee with general public. I was truly shocked!!!

Off late, Mamata Banerjee has been in news for all the wrong reasons. She made some absurd statements after the Park Street rape case, then a professor was jailed for making some cartoons, English newspapers were banned from public libraries in Kolkata!!! Much before all this, she forced the Tata to drop Nano plans in West Bengal.

I am not against Mamata Banerjee (I really do not care). She has always come across as an aggressive yet simple person. Unlike some of the other women Chief Ministers, she does not seem to have a liking for expensive saris and sandals and she does not seem to be a self/elephant statues person. She also comes across as a person who is driven by ideologies. People (like me) may not believe in her ideologies but I believe that someone driven by ideologies always has a strong character. 

I used to think and still think that Mamata Banerjee puts people welfare first before profits. It is good to think about people but there has to be a balance. What she did to Tata Motors was pretty unfortunate. Companies may think twice before investing in West Bengal and West Bengal is one of the poorer states in India. Anyways, that is not why I am writing this.

In the show, Mamata Banerjee probably came expecting that people would be scared to put any tough question, may pat her back and she would live happily ever after. Well...that DID NOT happen!!! 

One after another, people asked tough questions. Now a person with ideologies should be able to come up with an answer. People may or may not believe in those ideologies but there has to be a strong answer. She had none. So what was her reaction to the barrage of tough questions? She started blaming questioners. She started branding them as 'Maoists' or from "CPM Cadre"!!! One by one, all the questioners were branded in similar manner!!! Then she walked off the show. Very mature that was.

As if this was not enough, she made a statement that "Marxists and Maoists are plotting to kill me in league with the Pakistani Intelligence, North Korea, Venezuela and Hungary"!!! Is she completely out of her mind? Didi, do not worry about them. They are not India's well wishers!!

My analysis (:P) suggests that (a) she is suffering from schizophrenia as she believes that everyone is conspiring against her or (b) she is extremely creative in her thinking. Who else can come up with Venezuela and Hungary? or (c) she has a great sense-of-'rumor'!!!

Whatever it is, it seems that power has indeed gone to her head. She is behaving like a dictator and this should not be allowed. I hope better sense prevails and pretty soon.

And ya, Mamata Di (or Momta Di), "My Name is Kumar and I am not a Maoist"!!!

Jal-Krida

Have rediscovered by love for swimming. Have been swimming fairly regularly (almost daily) since last 3 weeks. Have also been increasing the number of laps regularly. Since last few days, have been doing 12 laps with ease. 

If only I could control my love for good food and occasional drinks. 

Games Period - II

The support system is crumbling and crumbling fast.......

The story of 'Person H'

1. Person A in Team A gets a project
2. Person B, who is charge of Team B has to deliver the project
3. Person C of Team B is made the project lead
4. Persons D and E of Team B have to 'actually' manage the project
5. Persons D and E of Team B leave the company (expected)
6. Person F who leads Team C and Person G who leads Team D offer to 'help' Person B of Team B
7. Person H of Team C and Person I of Team D are now handled the responsibility
8. Person H of Team C and Person I of Team D do not have any experience in the concerned industry
9. Person H of Team C is now the project lead
10. Person H reaches out to Person E, who is no longer with the company but was part of Team B, to get some pointers regarding how to go about the task
11. Person E tells Person H that the project is difficult to execute in the present timelines. The proposed timelines were longer but Person A 'caved in' infront of the client (same old story)
12. Person H is not amused!!!
13. Person I of Team D is available till the kick-off but is not available afterwards
14. Person J of Team D is pulled in to do the work of Person I
15. Person A has the job of making the promises to the client but nothing else
16. Person B has the job of....hmmm....well....nothing
17. Person H and Person J start the work
18. Both person H and Person J have other commitments as well
19. Person H puts in extra hours and tries to manage all the commitments
20. Person J cannot ignore some of the other commitments but does some good work
21. The draft work is sent to Person A, Person B and to Person I
22. Person B does not have time to review....not even 10 minutes
23. Person A suggests some changes in the work done by Person J
24. Person J is not available to make the changes
25. Person I is not available to make the changes
26. Person H has too much on his plate but has no choice and he takes care of the changes in the work that was supposed to be done by Persons I and J
27. Person H makes the changes and submits the deliverable
28. Person A is happy
29. Person B is always happy as soon as work is done and he does not have to do it or worry about it
30. Person A sets up a presentation with client at the last minute
31. Person I and J are not available
32. Person H has to take care of the presentation
33. Person H has a lot to be delivered on the same day but now has no choice but to prepare for the presentation
34. Person H, who is from Team C tries to contact Person F, who leads Team C to explain his agony
35. Person F is not available
36. Person H is screwed!!!
37. Person H is swamped but is choosing to blog first. He needs to vent out his anger and frustration

Frustrated

More than a month since I got a single day's break. It has been a hectic, tiring, stressful and more importantly frustrating journey. My day starts at 7am everyday and on most days, I go to bed well past midnight. This routine is particularly frustrating as I do not see others around me working their asses off. I work amidst people who are mostly chatting over a cup of coffee, spending a lot of time on Facebook, cribbing about their bosses, discussing increments and variable pay outs and above all, looking for opportunities outside the company!!! I am not suggesting that people do not work here but most do not work enough. And there are some who are made to compensate.

Unless pushed to the corner, I do not like to tell people at workplace that I have been putting in so many hours. If I do that, I expect people to understand my situation. Here, people listen to that, say 'oh, thats bad' and then say can you take 10 minutes out to do something additional? 

Yesterday was particularly tiring and frustrating. The first half was spent preparing for a 3 hour long presentation (170 slides!!!). I skipped lunch for it. The presentation started at 2pm and went till 4:50pm. Took half an hour break after that. Then started reviewing another set of documents that I had targeted to send yesterday. Found several issues and hence postponed the delivery. It does not matter as the actual delivery date is couple of weeks away. After that, I came back home and started working on some additions in the deck that was presented earlier in the day.

I was feeling frustrated as I knew that weekend would be equally shitty. In the weekend, I would be required to prepare a storyboard for a project that is starting after couple of days. I do not know whose brilliant idea was it to start a project with a ready storyboard. More often than not, the people with such brilliant ideas do not have to executive them. The project that is starting from Monday was supposed to be done by the people with the industry knowledge and they had indicated that it would take 8 weeks. After submitting the proposal, most in the project team quit the company (I wonder why!!!). Later, a new project team (including yours truly) was created and this team has ZERO industry knowledge. And this team will have to deliver the project in 5 weeks!!! Somehow, this calculation is beyond me. This is not all. There are lot of aspects regarding the project that are ambiguous. No one really knows what does the proposal actually mean....what is the proposed methodology. The people who are still around have suggested that lets ask the clients in the kickoff call!!! This would be the first in my career. We would be asking the client what is the meaning of something that is written in the proposal that we submitted!!! That is awesome. The state of affairs has been giving me a lot of stress and frustration.

Last night, while working on the additions in the deck, I started having a strange pain in my chest and left arm. I got scared expecting the worse but I did not want to think about it too much. There was no time to have a heart attack!! I continued working till 2:15 am. At that hour, no one in the Kuala Lumpur and Singapore offices were online. I got up this morning and started working on the storyboard. Noone from this project team is online!!! Spent half an hour with my daughter and I would love to spend more but that is not an option. Indeed I could have spent more time with her instead of spending time writing this useless crap. But I was feeling suffocated and had to let this out.

This is mighty frustrating. Is this worth it?

Games Period

Sachinism: Tell Me Why?

I have some questions related to Sachin. Some of them are as follows;

• If the only reason why Sachin has scored more runs than anyone else on the planet is that he has played for more number of years then why did anyone else not play <could not play> for so many years?
• If starting early has been the biggest contributor to Sachin's number of runs then where is Hasan Raza?
• Why do not people go through the stats before making comments like "India loses whenever Sachin scores a century"?
• Why is it that the most 'violent' critics of Sachin Tendulkar are all Sourav Ganguly fans? 
• Why do people find it difficult to suggest a single decent replacement for Sachin but still say that Sachin should retire?
• Why is it that some people suggest that all the wins under Ganguly's captaincy were due to his captaincy and all the defeats were because of Sachin's batting?
• Why is that only the score in the finals is looked at and not the road to the finals? 
• Why is it that some people are too busy pointing at a relatively slow 100th hundred but are not talking about the huge achievement of 100 hundreds? 
• Kohli was undoubtedly and by far the best Indian batsman on the Australian tour. But why is that some people wanted Sachin, arguably the second best batsman on the tour, to be axed? Why is it that Sachin, after so many successful years in International cricket, is still judged series-by-series? 
• Why is that some people start an argument over Sachin's batting, try to compare Sachin with Ganguly and after failing miserably start comparing their captaincy records?
• Why is it that in scenario (1) where Dhoni does not perform, India scores 250-300 but lose, Dhoni says that bowlers should understand that they will not always get a 300+ score to defend but in scenario (2) where his performance was okay, Sachin scored a relatively slow century, India scored 289 and lost, he says that a few more runs on the board would have been great?
• Why do a lot of Ganguly supporters do not like Sachin, the batsman and Dhoni, the captain? However while arguing, they start giving more pointers about Dhoni as the batsman and Sachin as the captain?
• If some people suggest that Ganguly left the scene gracefully to give chances to youngsters then why is he still playing domestic cricket and in IPL?
• How come Ganguly's commentary skills and Sachin's voice a point in an argument over Sachin's and Ganguly's cricketing skills?
• Why is it that some people cannot admire a star in the sky and always pray for a falling star?
• Why is it that some people cannot understand that in this land of poverty, pollution, corruption and scams, Sachin has given us more reasons to feel proud that anyone else?

(Disclaimer: Most of my arguments with people who disrespect Sachin as well as the above mentioned questions may suggest that I dislike Sourav Ganguly. Nothing can be farther from the truth. I actually admire Ganguly for his captaincy skills. I do believe that Ganguly had some shortcomings as a captain but he is still the best 'captain' India has ever had. And I do believe that the overall package had some limitations. I admit that I have said some stupid things about him during some heated debates but they have been purely because I had to defend Sachin from some violent 'Ganguly supporters cum Sachin bashers'. I strongly believe that Ganguly is our national hero and I respect him immensely.) 

Here, 'tomorrow' always look better

The best thing about this place is that it does not allow you to worry too much about what is going to happen tomorrow.......but only because there are too many things lined up for today that you are more worried about!!!

कुछ रिश्ते बस ख़त्म हो जाते हैं

I do not know what I want to or can write here. :(

I need to follow this mantra...........


Raghupati Raghav Raja Ram,
Jitna Paisa Utna Kaam

Sob Story

I started this year with a bunch of resolutions. As we are inching closer to the end of first quarter, I thought I will have a quick status check. It did not take much time since I have failed on ALL the resolutions.

The main reason for the failure is the "Work-Life Imbalance", maintaining which is ironically one of my resolutions. I had decided that no matter how much extra hours I have to work during the week, I will save the weekends for my family. Cannot remember when was the last time I had a proper weekend. I work at least one of the two days. Even when I am not working, the stress of the pending work, the schedule in the coming week and sometimes the things that could go wrong bog me down.

I spent sometime thinking about the reason for this situation and here are few reasons;

1. There is no place for team work in this office. People work in silos. More often than not, one person has to deliver the entire project. For example, on one of the projects I am working on, I am the only person who has to do the analysis and put together a deliverable. There were teams who helped in data collection but I can go on for hours about how they created more problems than solving them. Now when the data is with me (in all possible formats), I have to compile and analyze the data and put together an exhaustive deliverable...all my myself
2. So whats the big deal? Have I not done in the past? Yes, I have. On numerous occasions. However, on most of those occasions, I was the one who had put together the proposal. In this case, the proposal was created by....hmmm....almost everyone!!! Unrealistic promises were made to the client. This is something that I am experiencing for the first time in my life. People put together a proposal and if the project is bagged, more often than not someone else is made to "walk on fire". Anyways, the issue is that I have been made to deal with way too much ambiguity. And I felt that people forgot that I am new to this industry, new to this part of the world, the people and the work culture and I am new to this organization and the processes
3. Again, whats the big deal? Have I not dealt with ambiguity in the past? Yes, having worked in 2 start-up companies and 2 start-up teams, I am not new to ambiguity. However, there is way too much that has been put on my plate. To give an example, I am handling another project, which should have been as easy as they come. However, it has been turned into a disastrous one, thanks to some poor project management by the office who has the overall project management responsibilities. In spite of doing everything properly, now I have to worry about several additional steps and levels of scrutiny. With my existing work load, this was something I wanted to avoid
4. This situation has made me work till late almost everyday. I am among the first few to arrive in the office and on most days in past few weeks, I have been the one who "closes" the office. (ya, being the last person to leave the office comes with a punishment here. One has to switch off all the lights, ACs and then close the main door!!!). I work like this through the week and then I work on the weekends as well
5. But, have I not worked in this manner in the past? Yes I have....since my first company. In my first company, people used to start hovering the main door around 5:45 pm. 6pm and bang...it used to become a curfew like situation in the office. In that kind of place (no job satisfaction and no money), I have spent days on which I have arrived at 9 am on a day and left at 8 pm on the next day. In my second job, there used to be a week every month in which I used to go home only for 1 hour every day to freshen up and the remaining time was spent in office!!! Later, Deloitte took away the work-life balance completely but I must admit that I used to feel happy while coming back from the office everyday. So no regrets there. My fourth job was relatively better but it still made me work on several weekends, primarily because there was no team. So I am not new to this but  the point is that no one should be working like this. All the years of slogging in this manner has definitely taken a toll on my health and I must admit, I find it extremely difficult to put night-outs like before. My health has deteriorated and I am not getting any younger
6. Oh, what a sob story!!! Aren't both the projects getting over by the month end? So whats with all this cribbing? A few more days and the ordeal should be over, isn't it? Ya, that is what I was hoping for. Not that I was looking forward to a few weeks of relaxation and not much work. I was just hoping that for at least few weekends, I would get some time with my family. However, a new project is starting. A project where objectives and deliverables have been decided but somehow (not surprisingly though), no one focused on methodology. A project where there is shortage of time but abundance of "May Be"s. A project which I would be leading with no experience in the domain. A project where everyone says that they would help but on the calls they indicate that they have a lot going on and so they would only provide guidance wherever required. So what does that mean? That means that I would end up screwing few more weeks and weekends slogging like anything. I feel that suddenly the finishing line has been pushed back....5 weeks to be precise
7. Do I deserve this? I have worked like this in the past. I am often called a workaholic. So, I am "kind of okay" as long as I am learning something (cliched but true). However, my wife and my daughter does not deserve this. When I work at home and my daughter crawls towards me and my laptop, intending to play with me, often I bark at my wife to take our daughter away and put her in the crib. I feel sorry but I cannot help it. Not many know but everyday before leaving for office, I apologize to my daughter for not spending any time with her. She smiles and I feel like killing myself. I have already turned into a bad husband and a bad father. The trouble is that with the lack of processes and ownership and with too much on my plate to deal with, I may be heading towards becoming a bad employee and project manager. I do not deserve this. My family does not deserve this

Oh, I have wasted half an hour of precious time on the weekend writing this nonsense. Now I must get back to the deliverable.

What happened to all the weekends in my calendar? I cant find any!!!! :(

Ananya stopping me from going to office

Every morning I start hating my job (and for that matter, any job) all the more :(

Miss my country :(

Teri amrit bhari lehro ko kya maloom ganga maa,
Samundaar paar, viraane mein teri yaad aati hai,

Ke har ek khaali pade alind mein teri yaad aati hai,

Subah ke khwaab ke malind teri yaad aati hai,

Kahin dollar ke peeche chup gaye Bharat ke noton par…

Dikhe Gandhi ki jo moorat to teri yaad aati hai,  

Agar mausam ho manubhawan to teri yaad aati hai,  

Jhare meghon se jab saawan to teri yaad aati hai,  

"Hello-Hey-Hi" sun kar nahi aati magar humse ...

Koi kehta hai jab JAI HIND, teri yaad aati hai

Courtesy: Kumar Vishwas

Point to Ponder

In the next match, will BCCI allow the Australian cricket team's captain and team members to decide the rules of the game, where the Indian team will stay, what they will eat, who will play, who would not?

I guess they should. If N Srinivisan, BCCI president and owner of Chennai Superkings can decide the fate of other IPL franchisees, this should also be allowed!!!

Finally, I am off IPL.  

Project Management Tricks - II

Yesterday morning, just when I was stepping out of our home for the office, my wife handed me a big list of items that I was supposed to purchase on my way back home. I pointed (no, not 'protested'. I am not allowed to do that) that it will be an issue to carry all the items since it would become extremely heavy and I would also be carrying my office laptop (which, by the way, seems to have the same weight as me). My wife, being extremely reasonable, prioritized the list of items and indicated the ones that we absolutely needed. 

In the evening, she gave me a call and told me that she will come to my office and then we can together bring all the items. The plan sounded okay to me. 

In the evening, we met in the supermarket (which is pretty close to my office...and ten minutes walk from home) and finished our shopping. After the shopping, my wife chose the lightest shopping bag to carry. She of course carried our daughter but the way i see it, she had our daughter to entertain her on the way home. And me......I carried the remaining shopping bags. Easily a 15 Kg load. Plus the office laptop!!! 

For some reason, I felt slightly duped. However, I am happy that we had that sweet little outing.

So, she assigned the task, listened to the grievances, indicated that she understands the issues, suggested a smaller goal and then made me do EVERYTHING!!! And I am also looking at the positive side. Bang!!! Mission Accomplished!!! She has all the traits of a good Project Manager!!!    

These unpredictable buggers.....when you want them to win, they lose and keep losing. And today, when I wanted them to lose, they pulled off a win!!!

Thinking of donating myself for clinical research!!!

Conspiracy that backfired

It was a special day since chicken was in the dinner menu. Normally, it would have made me very excited but on that day, I was not really looking forward to it. The reason was that I was not going to be there for dinner and that is exactly why chicken was in the menu.

In our flat, on a weekly basis, people assumed the responsibility to run the expenses. We used to pool in the money (100 Rs each) at the beginning of each week. The money was then given to the person-in-command to run the show (only the kitchen) for a week. Then it was the person-in-command's responsibility to (a) decide the menu for the week (b) ensure that the expenses do not exceed the budget (c) ensure that people get good food. For any person-in-command, it was impossible to score heavily on all three criteria, especially in a budget of INR 700. Moreover, every person in the house (in total 7 regular occupants) had a different style of running the show and had different priorities. Except Amit and I, everyone usually focused on criteria (a) and (c). Both of us were particularly interested in meeting criteria (b)!!!

It was not surprising since both of us used to receive the smallest amounts from our respective families. I used to get between 3,000-3,500 every month. A good portion used to go in fixed expenses (rent, maintenance, electricity, maid, cook etc). I used to spend a sizable amount on telephone calls. For me, telephone calls used to always get higher priority than food. There was a phase during those MBA days when I used to skip meals in order to save money for calls!!! Enough of my sob story. 

Coming back to the incident...it was a Saturday night and I had plans for the evening. I was going to my cousin's place for the night. I had recently handed over the person-in-command's role. My week in command was pretty eventful as I was committed towards cutting down the expenses to the extent possible. I was short of money and the group had made some unnecessary expenses on luxuries (like good food!!) in the week before my command. I was determined to bring the monthly expenses back on track and in that pursuit I did not allow chicken to be included on any day during my command. This naturally attracted a lot of criticism.

After my week in command, I had handed over the responsibility to Bhaskar. It was during his week in command that I decided to go to my cousin's place on the Saturday. Saturdays used to be the Khichdi day so I was not going to miss much. However, as soon as Bhaskar came to know that I will not be around, he decided to include chicken in the dinner menu. Someone did point to him that I will not be around and he responded "so what"; loud enough to ensure that I hear it. Nothing wrong on his part as I had asked for this treatment. But I felt bad and angry. Bad because my friends did not understand and appreciate my situation and angry because I was going to miss chicken. It would have become 3 weeks without chicken; a little too much to handle!!!

I decided to sabotage their joy. Before I left for my cousin's place, I sent the cook to bring some stuff. The cook requested me to take care of the chicken, which was in the 'work-in-progress' stage. It was in the cooker and was almost ready. I took the container of red chilly powder and added a 'generous' (read: substantial) amount in the cooker. Then I left for the my cousin's place.

On my way to my cousin's place, I was feeling extremely happy about what I had done. The thought of the expression on their faces while eating the chicken and hopefully in the morning made me laugh. However soon I started to feel bad about what I had done. It was childish and naive on my part to do something like that. After all it was not their fault that I was having a financial crisis.

The next morning, after I returned to our flat, I casually asked about the chicken. It was as if I had asked a bunch of kids if they want ice cream. Everyone got excited and told me that the chicken was mind-blowing and the cook had done an exceptional job in making a really spicy and delicious dish!!! The cook was sitting in the corner, accepting all the admiration and adulation with a big grin!!! A mixed bag of emotions engulfed me. I was feeling stupid, angry but also a little relieved.

This was a conspiracy that clearly back fired!!! Thankfully!!!

But those were the days. Today, all of us do meet occasionally but a chicken dish or a beer bottle does not excite us like before. Those days were much better!!!

Kilkaariyaan

मैं कुछ कुछ रह गया था यहीं कहीं !

कुछ हँसी कुछ झगड़े

यहीं तो थे कहीं

कुछ रूठना कुछ मनाना

यहीं तो थे कहीं

किसी ने न जाना

मैंने खुद भी नहीं जाना

मैं कुछ कुछ रह गया था यहीं कहीं !

आँखों में घूम गए वो पल छुट्टियों के

जहाँ सभी खड़े होते थे मेरे इंतज़ार में

एक साथ छू लेने को तत्पर

सब अपनी अपनी कहना चाहते थे

बासंती रिश्तों की खुशबू

हमारे हर कमरे , आँगन में फैली होती थी

बेमानी ठहाके लगाते थे हम

हवाएँ भी रुक कर दांतों तले ऊँगली दबाती थीं !

..........

क्या यूँ उजड़ जाते हैं बीते पल

दरक जाती हैं दीवारें

फूलों की जगह उग आती हैं झाड़ियाँ .... !!

कुछ भी हो -

इस पल कोई पुकार मुझे सुनाई दे रही है

.....किसकी पुकार कहूँ इसे

सब तो एक साथ पुकार रहे हैं ...

....

कितनी अजीब बात है -

मैं आया हूँ अपने बेटे के साथ

पर कई अपने साथ हैं -

पापा, अम्मा , बहनें , पत्नी

और यह बेटा गोद में है ....

....

यह क्या अफरातफरी है

अचानक क्यूँ समय समाप्त की घोषणा है

मुझे बड़ी बेचैनी सी हो रही है ...

क्या आज यहाँ से चलने के पहले मुझे हिदायत नहीं मिलेगी

'ठीक से जाना '

!!!

जिसे सुनते 'ओह' ज़रूर कहता था

पर बड़ा सुकून था इस बात का

रोष होता था छुट्टियों के ख़त्म हो जाने का

तो ओह ' कहने का यही बहाना होता था !

..............

चलने से पहले कहता जाऊँ

घर वो घर भले न रहा हो

पर यादों की ईमारत इतनी बुलंद है

कि मैं फिर आना चाहूँगा

क्योंकि यहाँ की दीवारों में जज़्ब वो कहकहे

आज भी सुनाई देते हैं

और यकीनन जब जब हम आयेंगे - सुनाई देते रहेंगे

(Courtesy: Minni Bua)

After watching the remakes of Don and Agneepath, I have fully realized that there can be only one Don and Vijay Dinanath Chauhan....Amitabh Bachchan!!!

Blair Witch Project - Part 2

Weekend is over :(

Someone stole my 4-day weekend!!! :(

(Courtesy: www.time.com)

Weekend full of movies

List of movies/shows I watched this weekend and their ratings (on a scale of 1-5 with 5 being the highest):

Agneepath: 1 point

I have heard that the movie is doing pretty well in India but I did not find anything special about the movie. To be very honest, I had not particularly loved the original (and I am not talking about Scarface here) except the personality of Amitabh Bachchan in it. They took that out and hence I did not like it. Simple

Ladies vs Ricky Behl: 3.5

This was pretty watchable. Liked the concept. Though it has a pretty obvious ending but it was still a good time pass

Albert Pinto Ko Gussa Kyun Aata Hai: 2

A movie that has Naseeruddin Shah, Smita Patil, Shabana Azmi and also Om Puri. I always wanted to watch this movie as I am a Naseeruddin Shah fan. Needless to say that the actors were brilliant and they made me feel their But honestly, I did not find anything special about the movie. Moreover, I found the end pretty abrupt. I enjoy parallel cinema and my wife is a commercial cinema fan. So imagine the expression on her face when the credits started to come

Survivor India - Episodes 10 and 11: 5

I am really hooked to the show. I have never enjoyed the international series but probably due to the connect, I am really enjoying this show

Shor in the City: 3

It was pretty enjoyable inspite of Tusshar Kapoor in it. It has a fresh story and decent performances

Challo Dilli: 3

I do not know who was the person who discouraged me from watching this movie when it came out. I wont say that this is a brilliant movie but for a lazy Sunday afternoon, it was a good time pass

Don 2: 1

So now the Don has become a thief!!! Brilliant. In any ways, there is only Don and he went underground in 1978

Tanu Weds Manu: 4

Have watched the movie in bits and parts earlier and watched the full movie today. It is a sweet movie, inspite of Kangna Ranaut!!! Really liked the performances of most of the actors

Our Idiot Brother: 2

This movie stars Paul Rudd and has an interesting storyline but lets just say that it could have been a lot better. There was nothing too wrong with the guy. He may not have been street smart, he may have been sensitive, he may have been innocent but he was not an idiot!!!

Russel Peters - Green Card Tour: 2

It was enjoyable but it gets a 2 because it was just about okay by Russel Peter standards

Desi Boyz: 2

It was enjoyable in parts but those parts were few and far between

India-Australia 1st ODI: 1

Same old story, no new twists. They keep serving the same dish!!! Something tells me that I should stay away from the sequels

Long journey ahead with only one pit stop!!! :(

Today is the last day of a 3 +1 day weekend. I say 3+1 as the last day of any weekend/holiday is spent in (a) looking at the watch at regular intervals (b) mourning in advance for the dying weekend (c) making to-do list for the days to follow.

Though I enjoyed the break, I personally do not prefer such long breaks. Before you start thinking (assuming I have readers) that I have lost my mind or lead a depressing life away from work, let me clarify that point. Since we do not have a car and we have a little bundle of joy, we cannot really plan trips in and around the city. Though Ananya has been most understanding on most of our shopping trips, it could be a trap!!! We may be pushing our luck too far if we plan a day-long or longer trip. So, we spend such breaks sitting at home for the most part. And...HENCE...instead of 4 day weekends, I would prefer Tuesday/Wednesday and Thursday off!!!

Today is all the more depressing since I know there is only one public holiday between now and August!!! That is a long long long journey with only one pit stop!!!

Hey, where did my tattoo go?!!?

Dear Ananya,

On 4th February 2012, you had your first fall. You fell from the bed. Off late, you have become very active but it was not your fault. I was supposed to check if you are okay and I did not do that. I am extremely sorry about that.

You cried a lot and so did I. I took you to the balcony and showed you buildings, trees, birds and all kinds of meaningless things to distract you. I said sorry to you several times.

After a while, you looked at me and smiled. That made me cry once again. You probably do not remember it anymore but I do not think I can ever forget how you were lying on the floor with a shocked expression on your face and then started crying. It was my fault and I will never be able to forgive myself for that.

I am glad that you are alright. I would try to be a better father.

Love you....always,

Daddy

Its all in the mind

(Pic courtesy: Toon Pool)

Nadal just lost in the US Open final. That is not particularly heart-breaking. You win some, You lose some. However, he lost once again to the Joker from Serbia. Now that's a worrying bit. 

Today's match was extremely close. Was stretched to the 5th set and either player could have crossed the finishing line. The first set did not have anything spectacular. They both played decent (read: Okay) tennis. Rafa managed to take the first set. In the next two sets and the first half of the fourth test, Djokovic completely dominated Rafa. Djokovic did play brilliant tennis but Rafa allowed himself to be dominated and that is another worrying bit. 

Rafa picked up his game brilliantly in the second half of the fourth set to take the set and he kept the momentum in the first half of the fifth set. Though Rafa did lose the fifth set (and as a result the match), there was nothing to be ashamed of the manner in which he played the fifth set. He played extremely well but so did the Joker. That's fine and acceptable.   

However, the consistency at which Novak Djokovic has been beating Rafael Nadal is amazing and disconcerting. The results of the recent and consistent losses to the Joker is showing on Rafa. The defeats seem to have created a mental block and Rafa has not been playing his normal game (for the most part) against Joker.

Rafa is a gifted athlete, who slowly but steadily wears down his opponents through long rallies. Plus the angles that he creates with his shots make the court much larger to cover for his opponents. Though he is still successfully doing that against most opponents, he has been unable to do that consistently against Joker. So what is so different? What has changed off late?

No matter how much I dislike the Joker, I cannot stop myself from admitting that his game has improved immensely in the last year and half. He has always been strong with his forehand as well as backhand but his forehand has suddenly become a lethal weapon. Not only it has become much faster, it has also become much more accurate. With an extremely effective forehand, a decent backhand, a good serve and a supremely fit body, he is definitely a package that is difficult to beat. If only he was not so irritating, he would have won some more fans. Not that he cares. He should be happy with the rankings, trophies and moolah!!

The sudden improvement in Joker's game caught everyone by surprise. From being a close 3rd, he suddenly got into top gear and overtook everyone else. He has been beating everyone, including Rafa. The first 1-2 losses seemed like 'Rafa was defeated by a better player on that day'. On those occasions (first few losses), there was not much wrong with Rafa's game. It was just that everything was absolutely flawless about Joker's game.

However, the defeats started affecting Rafa (that is my theory, Rafa has not told me that. Honestly!!!). Now, there seems to be a mental block. Quite often, he becomes a little too defensive against Joker. The shots become much shorter, the angles are usually missing and he tries to keep the ball in play rather than make Joker run around. As a result, Joker gets to show off the might of his supreme forehand. He makes Rafa run all around the court and he beats Rafa in long rallies!!! It may be an exaggeration but Nadal's defensive strategy is pretty similar to what Martina Hingis used to adopt or was made to adopt against Venus Williams!!! In that case, of course there was a huge difference in the abilities (as per my opinion....and the statistics). Yet Venus Williams, through her powerful game, was able to affect Hingis much more mentally than anything else. The same seems to be happening to Rafa against Joker.

Rafa should try to exploit the weaker backhand (weaker only compared to the forehand) of Joker ut he seldom manages to do that. Moreover, he seems to be trying to do a little extra with his first serve, which has so far not been a particularly successful ploy. He ends up making mistakes and the decreasing first serve percentages are an indication. That is not alarming though. This ploy does help Rafa win some easy points. It is just that when it does not click, the situation is worsened by an extremely defensive and weak second serve. His second serve is nothing but cannon fodder for Joker!!!  

It is not that Rafa lags behind through out the game. When he sees a window, he picks up his game and starts putting pressure. He did the same thing at the end of the fourth set and through out the fifth set. He played like usual....brilliantly. Yet, Joker won the fifth set as he played marginally better and he handled pressure a lot better.

There is nothing wrong with Rafa's game. It is not that he cannot beat Joker. However, he needs to overcome the mental block. He has to believe in himself like I and his millions of fans believe in him. If he plays his usual game against the Joker, he should be able to substantially decrease Joker's dominance on the outcome. Today's match was indeed an evenly-fought contest but that was probably because Rafa played his usual game only in patches. Had he been his usual self, the result could have been different. 

You must overcome the mental block Rafa and should not allow Joker to manipulate your game.  I know that you can do it Rafa!!! Vamos!!!

And ya, well played today (in patches)!!! 

That's a bird....That's a plane.....That's my Super Gal!!!

Cooking: Nasi & Ayam Kari

Yesterday, I had my first serious shot at cooking. So far, my cooking has been limited to ready-to-eat meals and  instant noodles. I have always believed that I can be good at cooking but a serious handicap has always prevented me from becoming a good cook.....laziness!!

Yesterday, under the able guidance of the head chef of my house, I made chicken curry and rice. And it was not too bad. In fact it was "Yang Tidak Dapat Dilupakan"!!!!

Nasi & Ayam Kari or Rice & Chicken Curry

Please note: I did not make Carlsberg

I wish and hope to continue cooking and learn some more dishes. Right now, I plan to just learn the basics and learn the style of the head chef. Later, I will add my special...secret ingredient in the dishes and make them lot lot L-O-T better. My secret ingredient is....Creativity.